Transformers 2

Caught the midnight showing last night / this morning. Very good, especially if you loved the Transformers as children (as we both did), and you are prepared for a script far closer to:

<Insert Cool Visual, Like a T-Rex silhouetted by a nuclear explosion >

Good Robot: Save the Humans!

Humans: Save the Robots!

Bad Robot: Revenge shall be mine!

<Cool Transformer Sound>

<Fight!>

(Repeat for 2.5 hours)

And not that similar to, say,

Salaama Rodriguez des Pari: But I’m a college-educated Nicaraguan bisexual. I don’t even know how to deliver a baby/log timber/balance the federal budget!

Struggling writer who is obviously a thinly disguised representation of the film’s writer: Maybe you can’t do the work, but you can problematize the work!

Salaama: I will dismantle the monolith of imperialistic discourse!

(Repeat for 2.5 hours)

Autobots: Transform!

Update: Manohla Dargis, who accuses the film of not making President Obama as heroic as Optimus Prime and concludes “it’s easy to pretend that you’re not ingesting 2 hours and 30 minutes of warmongering along with all that dumb fun,” would obviously have preferred the film about Salaama.